Caged
by Ency Peterson
Summary: As a child he'd been trapped fighting for the entertainment of others.  As an adult he has been court ordered to go to counseling for anger issues.  His psychiatrist happens to be the boy who ended it all and the only one to have ever defeated Kanda.
1. Kanda Decides

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

**A/N: Sorry, but this started as a dream and then morphed. It even throws me for loops.**

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><p>Shit, the damn doctor <em>knew <em>about his past. Dammit, how was he gonna survive if the doctor ever found that fucking _kid _he'd lost to.

Yu Kanda Tiedoll had been seeing psychiatrists ever since his adoptive father had _allegedly _saved him from the cages. The thing that pissed him off about it the most was it was right after his humiliating defeat by that brunette freak with the strange-ass arm. Now the doctor wanted him to talk about that time. Did it really fucking matter if he was undefeated until the day that stupid rabbit appeared with said freak in tow? His doctor was a fucking white-haired _kid _himself. And his office was always fucking cold and the damn doctor wore fucking _gloves_. Wasn't it bad enough that he had to spend an hour sitting around doing nothing when he could have been fucking out with the damn rabbit playing some stupid video game at his fucking arcade instead?

"Did you wish to speak of the days when you were in that cage, Kanda?" the white-haired young doctor asked.

"Go to fucking hell," he growled at the doctor.

"Been there a few times. Must say, it's not exactly as bad as people claim. In fact it's pretty nice," the doctor was _still _fuckingsmiling. It never mattered what he said, the idiot bean sprout couldn't seem to lose that infuriating patronizing smile. "It never seizes to amaze me when I go how many expect me to be a babbling mess. Now you, on the other hand, seem to be in perpetual anger.

Kanda never liked dealing with people. He barely put up with his adopted brothers, that stupid rabbit, the fucking sister-complex or his sister. He hated this doctor. No, edit that, he fucking hated this fucking shitty-ass doctor who couldn't stop smiling if he watched his fucking parents get killed, not that Kanda knew anything about the boy. And even though he was a certified fucking doctor, he was only twenty-two. Kanda didn't care enough to be bothered with details like that though.

There was a knock on the door.

"Dr. Walker, there's a Marian Cross on the line for you," the receptionist said.

Walker's fucking smile became strained. Who was this fucking Cross? Kanda didn't _really _care, but even if Walker cut their session short, he wouldn't be allowed to fucking leave as it was well-known he liked to disappear. Damn Tiedoll and his fucking police contacts.

"How much is it this time?" He could hear the frown, but none showed on his face. "And you chose me because?" Kanda was actually enjoying listening to the boy be antagonized. "You couldn't just _wait _until I got home?… Of course I am. I actually _work _and not expect my best friend's _son _to cover the _debts _you could _handle _yourself.…I am not discussing this over an _unsecured _phone line when I have a _client _in my office.…Of course I can't leave for two weeks! I have a _job _now that doesn't involve obeying your _every _whim, Cross! No, you may not appeal to Froi, Link, _or _Leverrier.…Froi would agree way to easily with you and suggest we take him along. Link would refer the question to Leverrier, whom we both know _hates _my guts.…Fine, we'll discuss it more when I get home. Now if you rack anymore debt up before I get home, let's just say the women won't be liking you _quite _as much."

Kanda watched as the boy turned an evil smile on him. He was twenty-five and the doc was only twenty, why the fuck did he have to see the kid, again? Oh yeah, because he had fucking anger management issues, not that he'd ever admit it. He sighed in annoyance, waiting for the doctor's attention to return to him.

"Cross, he is _not _a psychopath. How many times have I told you that?…Seems to be, but really, can you blame the man?…Of course you could. You can blame every thing on someone _other _than yourself, just like your debts get passed over to me to pay.…Of course I know where La Femme is. I've only paid your bill there like a _thousand _times.…Of course I exaggerated, I was _trying _to make a point. Your debts keep piling up. It's a good thing I have a few clients who _actually _pay money instead of getting court-appointed, isn't it?" Dr. Walker finally hung up the phone. He'd finally fucking finished the conversation when he growled and kicked the nearby wall.

"Damn Master. He's a good for nothing playboy who hits people with a mallet when he doesn't get his way and he chose to take me under his wing after Mana died because I could easily pay off all his debts and now that I'm a legal _adult_, he just has them forwarded to me, his stupid ex-apprentice," he muttered.

Kanda smirked at the doctor, chuckling deep inside the recesses of his mind where he kept all those _nice_ feelings that he didn't want anyone knowing he felt.

"Looks I'm not the only one with anger management issues, Doc," Walker could hear the laughter in his voice.

"I do not have any issues that need concern you, Kanda. You on the other hand tend to threaten anyone that comes near you with whatever weapons you happen to have at hand."

"Whatever, Moyashi. You're a fucking hypocrite," Kanda snarled.

"You are supposed to refer to me as Doctor Walker, Kanda, or have you decided that I may call you by your name?"

Kanda just glared at the grey-eyed doctor, half wishing he wasn't his doctor creating those problems with outside relationships. That was _it. _He was investigating Doctor Allen Walker, aka Moyashi, or rather he'd make Lavi.


	2. Meet Lavi

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

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><p>"Dude, I can't believe you go to a shrink and never told me! That's so mean of you, Yu!" the hyperactive redhead was bouncing around him.<p>

"I know I need you to use the goddamn fucking hacking skills to obtain whatever you can about my fucking doctor, but that doesn't mean I won't slaughter you with my bare hands later for calling me that ridiculous name," Kanda snarled.

He knew he should have left it well enough alone, but that phone call had intrigued him even more. Oh, he was most definitely interested in his beansprout of a fucking shrink, not that he'd tell anyone exactly how interested he was and it's not like it had grown overnight either. He had known upon sight that his shrink was different. His shrink understood some of his patients better than most doctors would. He remembered watching the doctor handle the brunette woman that day, then appraise him.

"_Miranda, it's okay. You know that you will find something good eventually. You can't fail unless you give up. So try something new between now and our next session, but don't forget to keep doing the things you like to do otherwise you might forget and everything else you do will hold less appeal to you."_

_The brunette fervently thanked the white-haired shrimp wearing a lab coat. He asked his receptionist who was next. She pointed at Kanda and whispered his name to the doctor as well as handed him his file. The young doctor hadn't opened the file, just looked Kanda up and down. Suddenly he took off the jacket and told Kanda to follow him._

"_I don't like looking at a patient's files until after our first session unless necessary. My receptionist just told me what I absolutely needed to know. You are here by someone else's order and I have to call your adoptive father, Mr. Tiedoll, when your session is over. She also mentioned that your name is Yu Kanda. I'm fairly certain that if you had a sword and I called you by your first name you'd disembowel me. So until I'm allowed to call you by your name, I'm asking you to call me Dr. Walker."_

"_Moyashi, I will bludgeon you into that desk if you call me by my name."_

_The doctor smiled that infuriating smile, "Did you just give me permission to call me by your name?"_

_Kanda growled. If the fucking doctor wanted to play these games, fine. It wasn't like he hadn't scared off the last twelve shrinks he'd been _forced _to see._

"_Just to give you a head's up. If you were sent here because of a court case, which with your temper is the most likely scenario, it means I'm your last hope to keep out of jail. If I quit then you'll be stuck in prison for life. I don't scare as easily as other shrinks. In fact there was a nasty piece of work in here yesterday, sent because of his sadistic tendencies when he gets all decked out for black tie occasions and let's just say that he scared I think his count was up to forty psychiatrists. Normally I wouldn't breach the whole patient-doctor confidentiality thing, but I got his signed permission when he was in both extremes. It wasn't all that hard."_

"_So you don't get scared easily. So fucking what. You're still a fucking bean sprout, Doc. I'll call you whatever the hell I feel like calling you."_

"_Then I'll call you by your given name," the boy's smile became a small smirk before returning to earlier state. "Now then, do you want to tell me _why _I have to call your adoptive father even though you're an adult?"_

_Kanda glared at him, "It's in the fucking file."_

"_Alliteration and cursing. Two of my favorite things," Allen responded sarcastically._

"_Why don't you go to fucking hell?"_

"_Well, that's the thing. I've been there, a few times. I must say, it's actually very nice. Not quite as hot as I expected. A nice hearth to stay near as I talked with Satan himself. Now see he's told me he's looking forward to seeing you one of these days. Of course when we spoke, I didn't know he talking about you specifically, but now that I've met you, I'd have to say the devil's right. Your wrath is going to lead you there."_

_Kanda glared at him. The stupid fucking doctor just smiled back at him. They stayed like that the rest of the hour. Doctor Walker called Mr. Tiedoll at the end._

"_I must say that was actually very productive for a first session," the doctor informed both Kanda and Mr. Tiedoll. "I must ask that if you don't already know it, learn to meditate. If you do know meditation, meditate every night and every morning. Also before our next session, figure out who out of all your acquaintances you currently despise the most. We'll need that for our exercise next session. Miss Daniels will tell you when it is, so just check with her. Also, I better warn you that any attempts to kill me between now and our next session will warrant in a visit from several different people, the worst of which has red hair. He's always drunk or with a woman unless he's on the run or found a new target to kill. He tortures his victims first."_

_Kanda's eye twitched. He hated the Moyashi, but the fact that he hadn't constantly bugged him into talking was nice. He didn't care what the doctor said about their session. Kanda couldn't see how it could have possibly fucking been productive except in not royally pissing him off. He hadn't had to stare at a fucking lab coat which was nice. The doctor actually was well-built when Kanda thought about it. He didn't want to be the damn doctor's patient. Damn it, he wanted to learn about the doctor's life outside of work. Did the sadistic bastard try anything with his Moyashi…_

_What the fuck! Kanda stopped moving. He'd been following his adoptive father thinking about his Moyashi…When the hell had he started thinking about the doctor like that? Kanda growled. Mr. Tiedoll looked at the man he'd taken in more than ten years ago. Kanda glared at the old man whose glasses seemed a bit crooked._

"_He wasn't lying about the red haired bastard, my son. The man is _his _adoptive father. Don't do anything stupid between now and then, please."_

Kanda glared at his redheaded friend, wishing instead to be back in that small period of silence that his Moyashi gave him. He'd given up on trying _not_ to call the doctor his. He wanted as much information on his Moyashi as possible. Damned if he had to ask the fucking rabbit for help.

He'd gone to the arcade and steeled himself for the inevitable reaction. He'd been so fucking right.

"Well, Yu?"

"Well, what, fucktard?"

"Whose your doctor and how long have you been seeing a shrink."

"That fucking old man made me see a fucking shrink from the day after he adopted me. I've only been foisted upon the fucking Moyashi because of the goddamn courts six months ago when the fucking retard before him complained that I threatened him too much in the first fucking session."

"I need a name, Yu," the redhead sounded exasperated.

"It's Kanda, fucking Rabbit."

"Not your name, too! Does he have your temper?"

Kanda glared at him. Lavi just shrugged as he let his friend follow him into his closed arcade. Above the arcade full of old games and several new, including several themed pinball machines, was his apartment. Lavi was one of the lucky ones from their young days. He'd come out with a nice life and the ability to keep from being sent to a shrink. Kanda didn't really remember most of the others, except a boy so similar to him that they'd had to be housed in separate areas of the dungeons. He wondered what happened to Alma, but wasn't about to ask the stupid rabbit to go digging for that. Asking for help at all was hard enough.

That doctor was unique. What kind of doctor thinks they made progress when _every_ session they rarely speak?

"So what's the shrink's real name?" Lavi asked once they reached his apartment and he opened his laptop to get to work on what he'd perfected over the years - his hacking of even the most secure networks.

"Doctor Allen Walker," Kanda informed him.

Lavi was tapping away when he suddenly cursed.

"What?" Kanda demanded.

"I hit his firewall, and it trapped me. No matter what I do, I'm caught if he chooses to chase me. I could get fined or worse if he chooses to press charges," Lavi sighed as they heard a ding on his computer.

_**Crowned_Clown: **__I was wondering when Kanda would start trying to find out more about Doctor Walker. So is he with you, Lavi?_

Both men looked at each other surprised.

_**Crowned_Clown:**__ I know you happen to be shocked, but I really don't have much time to play games with you. My guardians are very temperamental when they don't get their way, and it's been a long time since I've let them have what they want. I'll have to give them what they want today._

Curious, Lavi finally typed back.

_**BookerBunny:**_ _How did you know?_

_**Crowned_Clown: **__Unique, Lavi, but I know more than people give me credit for. The cages still exist. Did you know out of all of you kids only two couldn't escape? _

_**BookerBunny:**__ Who?_

_**Crowned_Clown: **__Alma and a brown-haired boy who never had a name. Alma is kept under sedation and the other was, you could say he was killed._

Kanda and Lavi looked at each other. How could this Crowned_Clown possibly know anything about them. How did he know and how had he or she managed to block or trap Lavi when it came to hacking. Lavi had become the _absolute _best.

_**Crowned_Clown: **__You could say it was the doc that killed the boy. Allen Walker is a walking contradiction. A boy forced to grow up before his time. He doesn't even care if you know, otherwise he would have stopped me from responding. He knows even more than I do. In silence is when secrets are the loudest. He knows about your loss, Kanda, but he doesn't care. He knows about Lavi's own secrets, but refuses to let me speak of that. I think he actually cares about the two of you._

_**BookerBunny:**__ What do you mean?_

_**Crowned_Clown: **__I mean Allen is wanting to leave our guardians more and more. The only reason he stays is me. He promised to never leave me alone again. Don't worry about your little problem of going back to court for any reason. Allen won't turn you in for trying to infiltrate his patient files or his own files. I will warn you that any searches for him will turn up the same as this one. I've got to go. My guardian's calling. Just don't hurt Allen. He's been through enough._

Lavi and Kanda were shocked. If every search for Allen would end up with conversations with this Crowned_Clown, then they'd have to try other means of getting information. What did the Clown mean by he'd killed the boy and that he'd been through enough. Did this clown know who that boy was? What did he mean about Alma and why would Allen protect this Clown?

"I've got other ways to research him," Lavi eventually spoke, shaken to his core.

"Try a Marian Cross instead. He called today while I was at my session and Lavi, tell anyone about this and I will seriously destroy you."

"Do you want me to find out more about that Alma? I have a feeling it'll be easier than finding anything on your doctor or this Marian Cross."

"No. I don't care about Alma right now. If they've got him sedated and locked up, we'll free him, eventually. Right now our priority is learning more about Allen and how he could possibly be related to _them."_


	3. Allen

Allen stared at his blank screen as he thought about what he'd told them. He'd given them more information than they'd really needed and lied a lot, but he'd known it was Kanda immediately, and he felt it necessary to inform him that he'd never meet the young boy that had defeated him _ever _again. That boy was gone. He couldn't be that boy ever again. If his housemates were going to use him, he had to make sure they were unaware that most of his clients would investigate him and eventually them. He was pretty sure Kanda and Lavi wouldn't stop their research. Giving that tiny bit of information had been a debate within his mind since he'd started being Kanda's psychiatrist.

"Allen, come lay down with me, please," an older voice called from the bedroom the three men shared when they were all there, usually Allen in the middle.

"Coming, Neah," Allen sighed as he closed his own laptop. Even if the two had ever tried to find out about his communications, they couldn't. He knew his way around every possible network system and he was as flexible as any gymnast he'd ever had the pleasure or in some cases displeasure of meeting.

As he climbed into the bed with the older, tanned male, he sighed.

"What's wrong?"

"Are you ever going to let us go, Neah?"

"When I get tired of you, maybe. You'll still be with Cross, though."

"Cross will let me go when you do, and you know it. He only puts up with me because of you."

"You're so cute when you're irritated. How did your sessions go today? Did any of them speak of _those _days?" Neah curled an arm around the boy.

"No, but when it was brought up, they all became silent. None of them spoke. Several became pissed or otherwise agitated. A couple of them smiled. One became terrified. As though there was something he didn't want me to know," Allen dutifully informed the man. "Then Cross called."

"Is he finally coming home?" Neah's voice sounded happier.

"He has a large debt at La Femme, Neah," Allen sighed as he lay facing away from the man. He wouldn't leave his inner self, his more evil persona, alone with them. And that _clown_, if allowed out, _would _kill both Neah and Cross for everything they'd forced him to do. It wasn't pretty and Allen hated thinking on it.

"Why does he do this?" Neah wailed, shoving Allen away from him.

"I don't know, Neah, but maybe its to keep up a cover?" Allen sighed, knowing what would happen next.

Allen stayed seated in the undignified lump that he'd become when Neah had shoved him off. When items began flying, he stayed like that - that is until Neah threw Mana's lamp.

"Neah, don't throw Mana's things!" Allen jumped up, catching the lamp.

"Why shouldn't I? He left us _both _alone!"

"It wasn't his choice! He died to protect us! He didn't die so you could throw away your dreams, Neah! I mean come on! Mana was the best thing to happen to me, would I stay with his brother if Mana had ever once told to that he even remotely _disliked _you? He loved you! He loved his only family! How do you think I felt when he was taken from us? Do you think I partied or dishonored his memory in some way? Why would I when he's the first and so far _only _human in existence to have loved me _and _my arm? I know both you and Cross have thought about having it amputated so you don't have to look at it."

Allen wasn't looking at Neah anymore but instead at his feet. He was standing, holding that precious lamp in his arms. He couldn't see Neah's sudden joyous expression as he heard the door behind him open. Allen tensed up.

"Having another fit, boy?" that menacing voice asked from behind. "Next time just jump off the balcony."

The man then threw Allen into the hallway where he slammed into the wall. The door to the bedroom closed, leaving him out of the single bedroom, not that he'd complain. Instead, he went into their living room where he gently placed the lamp beside his laptop which was open, and on.

Allen sighed. "I knew he'd check," he muttered. "He must be drunk to have left the evidence."

He quickly checked his computer for any bugs that the maniac would have placed on it. Allen knew he was paranoid, but that's how he and consequently his alter ego survived. He had multiple lives. One could almost say he was a spy, but he only had two names - Allen Walker and The Crowned Clown. He didn't need any other alias.

Of course he was aware of how he was referred to by coworkers when he'd be sent on missions. He was the freak, the maniac, the orphan, the cursed one, the killer. None of them knew the truth though. He was a slave. A modern day slave at the age of twenty-two. He wouldn't be free unless Neah and Cross gave him up or died, and no matter what, they wouldn't die. He could only hope that Neah would get tired of him or Cross would return to Neah on a more regular basis. He plugged his headphones in as he heard the two men's moans.

It was as he was listening to his play list to help him through his depressed times that Cross's name was being searched. He grinned. Time for the real Clowned Crown to have a little fun.

_**Crowned_Clown: **__Didn't I warn you not to search anymore, Lavi? Don't pretend you aren't there either. I'm alerted when anything even remotely connected to Allen is searched. You could just be checking credentials and it would still alert me._

_**BookerBunny: **__Why would Allen be paying a government official's debts? The government would pay them for him._

_**Crowned_Clown: **__Does it really matter? Kanda's interested in Allen. If he truly wants to learn about Allen, he's gonna have to decide why. Allen's not exactly happy, but he'll survive. He always does. He always will. He's not weak you know. He has me._

_**BookerBunny:**__ What do you mean?_

_**Crowned_Clown: **__Don't you really want to know how I could be better than you? I'll give you a hint. You and Kanda have met me and consequently Allen once before Kanda became Allen's patient. Only once._

_**BookerBunny: **__I think Kanda would have remembered meeting Allen before. Why don't you tell me when we met before?_

_**Crowned_Clown: **__Because that would be cheating. It's not fair when Kanda is so cold to everyone. If he ever had anyone that he got along with decently fine, then maybe, just maybe Allen wouldn't be so unwilling to hurt the man again._

_**BookerBunny: **__What do you mean?_

_**Crowned_Clown: **__Don't you remember our earlier chat? The boy that Kanda lost too is dead. I should be going soon. My guardians should be finishing up with their make-up sex._

_**BookerBunny: **__How old are you?_

_**Crowned_Clown: **__Allen's age, though technically I'm older than the white-haired doctor, to the doctor, I'm a replacement for the boy he was forced to kill._

Allen quickly logged off, completely resetting his computer's chat history, knowing they'd be done soon. It was as he began doing a bit more research on Kanda that he felt the presences behind him.

"Interested in someone, boy?" the redheaded man demanded, causing Allen to look at the man, turning his chair to face him.

"N-no, Master. He's F-froi's adopted s-son, K-kanda. I haven't m-managed to get him to o-open up during s-sessions," Allen stuttered. "I'm s-sorry if I should h-have left it alone."

"Cross, he's so adorable, but if you'd stay with me we could kick him out," Neah shrugged as though Allen didn't matter to him.

"Hmm, I'd have to cut my cover though, wouldn't I?"

"Aren't you fed up with it anyway? It's been almost fifteen years." Neah trailed a hand down the man's bare chest.

"He can leave after he's paid La Femme's bill. Then I never want to see him in the same _room _as you again," Cross Marian declared.

"As long as I have my Cross back, I don't care," Neah pouted. "Oh, you might want to pack up anything of yours that's in the bedroom after you've made us dinner. I _am _going to miss our threesomes but I _value _Cross more than you."

Allen didn't say anything as he stared at them. It was time to go hunting for his own place, _finally_. It would be a while before he could afford it though with that million dollar debt to La Femme. Oh well. Maybe he could sleep in his office. The only things that were _actually _his were the lamp, some clothes and his laptop. He also owned some necessary hygiene products, but that was it. The lamp was one of the few things Mana had liked, so when he'd been given some money, Allen had bought it as a gift for Mana. Mana had accepted it which had made Allen the happiest boy in the world.

He still remembered when Neah had shown up to destroy their happiness. It wasn't because he'd hated Allen or Mana. It was because there were several young boys locked up in cages forced to fight for the entertainment of others. Allen hadn't really understood until he was shoved into one of those cages. His first fight had been against Lavi the Hacker. Lavi fought, but he'd been analyzing Allen's moves.

They'd made up some ridiculous story about him having been thrown out into the streets to fend for himself. Then he'd been offered a deal. To be housed and fed, all he had to do was fight and win. If he lost a fight, he wouldn't eat. Allen decided he wouldn't lose. Even as Lavi had analyzed him, he'd quickly assessed his opponent and won. It hadn't taken that long. When he'd finally been pitted against their champion, Allen hadn't spoken.

He had seen the fear of losing in his opponents eyes. The loss of food wasn't something that was held over his head, but having gone hungry before Mana had adopted him, Allen didn't wish to go hungry ever again. He would find a way to end this sick entertainment. After he'd defeated Kanda, he saw Cross and a team of people swarm the building. He hadn't known about the tracking device or the mini camera that had been inserted into his sparse clothes. Mana had been _that _paranoid about possibly losing his son. He'd also been paranoid about his brother, but his brother _was _an adult.

How could Allen have known that the ringleader of the business had trailed him when he'd left? To make sure to teach Allen a lesson about interfering with other's business, he'd killed the only person to have loved him. Then he'd had his goons treat him to a very special treatment before leaving a scar on the boy's face that would remind Allen that he was the cause of the man's death.

It had scared him that what Mana had asked them to do was to leave Neah _and _Allen alone. Mana would gladly die if they left his son and brother alone. The man had grinned sadistically before informing him that after that day, neither Allen nor Neah would be bothered by him or his crew as long as they stayed out of the man's business in the future. Mana's last words were to remind Allen that he loved him no matter what and that he had to keep walking.

Allen looked out the window as the first snowflakes fell.

"I'm sorry, Mana, but I have to repent for what I did to Kanda," Allen sighed silently as he went to make supper for the two men.


	4. Mana and the Cages

It had been three weeks since their last session. When Kanda arrived at the psychiatrist's for that day's session after the three week hiatus, he was surprised. There was a young blonde boy playing in the lobby. As he watched Dr. Walker leave his office, he saw the boy's golden eyes light up. He watched as the boy, only about ten, latched onto Allen. The boy began talking animatedly causing his Moyashi to laugh.

That laugh caused Kanda to stop moving. He didn't know why, but it was diferent from anytime the doctor had laughed at any joke ever told to him. Finally he could hear what they were saying.

"Now, Tim, I promised your father that I would take care of you since your mother's death. I've been where you are, so I'm not going to leave you although I don't know why he didn't tell me that that particular debt was for you," the doctor smiled. It wasn't the infuriating smile either. It was a true smile. One that spoke volumes.

"But now _you're _my daddy, right?" the little boy was unsure.

"Only if you want me to be. You know you'll see them every now and again. I can't stop them even if you were _always _mine. There's a lot about their relationship to me that I can't really explain until you're older, but trust me. If I could protect you from all the evils in the world, I would."

"Then can I call you Daddy?"

Kanda's Moyashi looked shocked, and Kanda knew he was shocked. The doctor happened to look up.

"Let's talk about this later, Tim. If you want I'll take you for ice cream before dinner tonight. Monday however you have to go to your new school without complaint."

"Ok, Allen!" the boy bounced back to the toys he was playing with.

Kanda quietly followed the doctor into his office. Once inside, Allen closed the door and locked it.

"Before our session begins, I should warn you that since Timcanpy came into my life, I've become as paranoid about his safety as Mr. Tiedoll is for your sanity. Hurt that little boy and even if I might owe you a past debt, I will consider your life forfeit as my prize. Watching a child as bright as him be saved from his father's abusive ways and mother's promiscuity is nice, but that child deserves to keep his happiness no matter how false it is for as long as possible. That's why if you want to do anymore research on me or my guardians or anyone else in my life, you had better make certain you and your hacker are both willing to pay the ultimate prices. I can and will bring your worst nightmares to life. Trust me, your lives are nothing compared to what I could turn them into, and it wouldn't be traced to me."

"What do I care? You're a fucking doctor, what secrets could you have? What scars could that boy possibly have?" Kanda demanded, really wanting to ask why the hell his Moyashi was so friendly with that blonde boy.

"Some of the scars that take the longest to heal, Kanda, are the ones we keep hidden even from ourselves. I should know that best," the doctor told his patient while looking at his left arm. "Now to our session. Have you thought about those days in the cages?"

"Does it fucking matter? You already know about those days then I guess you also know that I lost my final battle. The battle right before we were fucking swarmed, but then you know that don't you? I mean I heard a fucking rumor that _you_ killed the boy that had defeated me."

"You could put it that way I guess. I was the cause of his downfall which then led to his death. That boy just wanted to be loved. He'd do anything for _one _person to like him. It could have been any person. I wanted to help people. Even then, causing that lonely little boy more heartache than he should have been forced to bear. Do you regret losing to him?"

"I only ever lost to him, and you took away my chance for a rematch," Kanda snarled.

"Is that all or are pissed because you wanted to know more about him? He was a falsely happy child, wasn't he? Did you enjoy fighting in those cages so much that one loss hurt you that much?"

Kanda just glared at the fucking doctor.

"Think about this, Kanda, you probably had an ultimatum given to you when you started fighting. One that would change to cause you to fight harder if it looked like you were losing entertainment value, correct? Now, if you had met and lost to that boy in a moderated battle for martial arts would you be pissed or would you have been proud to lose to a fighter that could teach you to fight better against other opponents of his type?"

The rest of the session was spent with Kanda glaring at his fucking Moyashi. He was pissed that now he really couldn't get any information on his Moyashi to try to find a way to get closer to him. He didn't know why he wanted to be close to his psychiatrist, he just did.

The doctor didn't bother looking at him, so Kanda could actually ogle the man without much worry, that is until near the end of the session when his Moyashi broke the fucking silence.

"If you want a picture to take home with you so the image of me lasts longer, I'm certain Mrs. Daniels has one. Otherwise, I'm taking you and Tim for ice cream. I want to show you something."

Kanda didn't answer with anything except a grunt. Allen didn't look behind him as he exited the office.

"Tim, are you ready to go? Mrs. Daniels you still have some photos, correct?"

"Of course, why?"

"Kanda was pulling a Rhode."

"I don't want your fucking picture, idiot. I want to know why you know so fucking much. I want to live my life without having to see fucking shrinks and I really just want to be left a-fucking-lone," Kanda snarled causing Tim to bury his head in Allen's leg, which he was attached to.

"Then you're coming with us for ice cream, correct?"

"Does it fucking matter?"

"Of course it does. I don't get paid to help you, but the sooner I get you through the anger management, the sooner you can go to a life without dealing with unwanted shrinks, though I doubt your hacker friend will be dislodged nearly as easily."

Kanda was quiet as Allen led both him and Tim to his vehicle parked on the street. It was a Mini. Kanda looked at Allen surprised that he had the Mini. He had taken the doctor for more of a Porsche or Saturn kind of vehicle, either sensible or showy, but a little thing like a Mini? Kanda was speechless.

"Tim, backseat. I've told you that before. When you turn thirteen I'll let you start sitting up front," Allen told the boy without even seeing that he was trying to get in front.

"But, Allen?" Tim whined.

"No, Timcanpy. I won't let you possibly get hurt while I'm driving. I'm not as sadistic or masochistic as your father."

"Allen, please, I want to be in front!" Tim tried to plead.

"Timcanpy Walker, I told you no. I know you may want to endanger yourself because it seems like it would be fun, but you don't have a choice. Backseat or do you want to go back to foster care because I was seen as unfit to take care of you?"

"But aren't you going to adopt me?" Tim asked.

"As long as everything goes right, I will adopt you. You were lucky they let you come with me. If they can provide proof that I'm unfit to take care of you, then it won't happen, but the weight of your foster mother is actually low compared to your natural father. Do you know that I was adopted?"

His Moyashi had been an orphan. Tim had looked at him like he was lying.

"Of course, your father took me in when my father was killed," Allen told the boy. "Now today happens to be one of the days I make certain to visit his grave. This is the day he first met me. I wasn't adopted until Christmas. It was both a birthday and Christmas present and since otherwise I'd have been on the streets, there wasn't any opposition. Neah will probably be there. He always said this was one of Mana's happiest days."

Allen got in the car. Tim did as well. Kanda looked at him. His Moyashi had such secrets? No fucking way.

"Why the hell are you taking me with you? I'm just another one of your patients," Kanda demanded.

"You aren't just another of my patients, though, Kanda. You happen to be the only patient that I actually personally want to help. I feel I owe you that much. Since it's probably my fault you second guess things. He had a deformed arm you know. That boy. It was kept hidden so he wouldn't reveal it. He fought each of his opponents until you one-handed. But you, he couldn't _not _use that arm against and therefore you were the only one out of all of them to have seen it. Did you think he was strange with that arm? Did you get distracted by it? Afterwords did you think of him as a freak?"

"What the hell are talking about? That boy may have had a different left arm, that didn't make the boy a freak. No way was I distracted. He beat me in as fair a match as it could have been considering I was more concerned about protecting the other boys than what my opponent looked like."

"So you had either a close friend or brother or cousin in there, right? I'd guess Alma. Tim, listen to your music please. Me and Kanda still have a few things to discuss that you aren't suppose to hear and if you do happen to hear then don't tell anyone, okay?"

Tim nodded and pulled his headphones on.

"Kanda, I know Alma is alive. I haven't kept tabs on everyone who had been there for no reason. See I owe every one of them a debt. The only ones I couldn't help were you and that boy. That boy that was also Mana's son."

"So you ended up killing your own brother?" Kanda was even more shocked. The doctor didn't look at him.

"I did and I didn't. We're almost there," Allen sighed as he turned down a country road that Kanda was actually familiar with.

"There aren't any graves out here, Moyashi," Kanda growled.

"Yes, there are. You just have to know where it is exactly to be able to find it."

As he turned onto private property, Kanda noticed a bike with two helmets on it.

"Are you sure we should be here? I mean, this is private property. Besides it looks like the owners are home."

"Of course the owner's here. I just arrived. I had hoped they'd be gone by the time I got back, but I suppose it's only fitting that I deal with him again," Allen grumbled. "Tim, we're here, and please don't go trying to murder your father or uncle. I really don't need the cops out here when he's the one they'll blame instead of your old man, okay?"

"Can't you be my daddy, Allen?"

"Like I said, we'll talk about it in a bit. Let's go."

They walked in silence as Allen lead them to a grave that lay in an open area in a valley. A single tree shaded the place.

"Look, your brat's here. And he's brought company," the redheaded man standing beside a tanned man with curls spat at the grave. "I know I told him never to appear in the same room as my Neah again."

"I _had _hoped you'd be gone by now, Cross, Neah."

"You brought his son?" Neah asked incredulous.

"It's not my fault your boyfriend was a womanizer for fifteen years, Neah."

"Yes it was," Cross countered. "If you weren't distracting _my _Neah from me I wouldn't have had to find my pleasures elsewhere."

"Yeah well, Tim wants to call me his father. I can't possibly allow him without your permission, considering."

"Oh yeah, the papers are sitting in the kitchen of your apartment. I don't know why you haven't decided to live here."

"Are the papers _signed_, Cross? Did you make sure _both _of you signed them before breaking into my apartment?"

Kanda was starting to get a migraine listening to their cryptic talking.

"So, they're actually in this kitchen. I couldn't get into your apartment and neither could Neah," Cross grunted. "You've got some kind of unique security system, idiot."

"Well, you've tried to hack my system. Did you think I'd leave my office or living quarters any less protected? Especially when you kicked me out and most of my patients have ties to the cages?"

"Should you be talking about this in front of him?"

"Tim won't speak about it, and Kanda, let's just say I owe him a lot more than you might think."

"Isn't he Tiedoll's boy?"

"One of them. He knows more than the others and he's friends with Lavi."

"The only one besides Karma who _isn't _seeing a shrink?"

"Yes. He is unique in that he was taken in by the only one of _your _associates licensed in psychiatry, you know. Since I know so much about the cages, most of them end up with me anyway. Lavi owns the arcade on Fourth."

"That close and I never knew?"

"Crowny didn't want you to. So, I didn't tell," Allen shrugged.

"What about what I ordered you to tell me?" Neah finally spoke, anger underlying his words.

"Well, Crowny takes precedence over _both _of you, I warned you of that when you first took me. That's why I stayed so long. Now I'd like to pay my respects to Mana, if you don't mind?"

"I don't see what my brother saw in a _freak _like you," Neah turned away from the doctor.

Cross grinned, "I guess that means he's finally _completely _done with you, idiot. Thanks for helping even though it went against what Mana wanted, idiot."

"Doesn't mean anything if we can't help Alma, Cross."

"Now that you've got someone else to worry about, stay out of it. You don't want a repeat of last time, do you?"

"I will keep Tim safe at all costs and I've already decided upon his guardians should I get killed or die before he's a legal adult."

"Not them," Cross seemed unhappy.

"Who better? I only know their whereabouts because of who I am. Everyone else _including _you couldn't find them. They'll keep him safe especially if it's a request of their past _savior_. You know it as well as I."

"Fine, but if they end up corrupting my son," Cross had intended to threaten Allen but Allen laughed instead.

"If he goes to them, I won't be here anymore. Besides I'm fairly certain that couple has better things to do than corrupt a ten year old boy whose mother was a prostitute and father was gay."

"Bi, idiot. I'm bisexual, how else would a man who likes men be able to stomach having sex with a woman?"

"I don't know. How could I know when I've only been _done _by men?" Allen countered.

"You've gained a backbone in three weeks. You're going to need it. They're looking for you. They want the best back and if you ever _don't _keep that make-up on in public, they'll find you. Don't bother dying your hair. They didn't know your name and you didn't go white until _after _he died and they were gone, so just keep the scar and your arm hidden. You'll be fine."

"I know, Master," Allen finally gave in, surprising Kanda, but not Tim. Kanda couldn't believe his ears. His Moyashi was being hunted? Why the hell hadn't he been aware of it? He _always _knew when someone he cared about was in danger, so why was he unaware of his Moyashi being hunted?

Kanda was unaware of his scowl as he glared at Cross.

"You might be Froi's boy, but that doesn't mean I like you," Cross told him before turning and leaving.

"If you own this place," Kanda started after they heard the bike start up and drive away, "then why the hell do you have an apartment in town? It's not that long or far of a drive into town."

"Because this belongs to the life I used to live. This belongs to that brown haired boy that disappeared the same night Mana was killed and you were saved," Allen admitted looking at the grave whose tombstone read _Mana Walker: Beloved Father, Friend, and Brother_. "Tim come say hello to your grandfather if you're going to call me Daddy."

"I can really call you Daddy?" Tim was excited.

"If that paperwork is really on my kitchen table, _all _of the paperwork that I need then yes."

"I still don't know why you brought me," Kanda snarled.

"Meet the reason you were saved. He was so paranoid about losing his son that even though he told his son that no matter what he wanted to do, he'd support him, he refused to let him go into those cages to aid all of those children without having every piece of technology that would possibly help if anything disastrous happened."

"Tim, your grandfather was first and foremost a clown. He wanted to help bring joy to people all around him. When he wasn't performing, he was a gentleman. The perfect gentleman. He loved his brother and his son, but when he was forced to decide on one of them to die, he chose for them to kill him. His last words were that he loved both of them and he wanted them to continue walking," Allen didn't notice the tears that fell down his cheeks, revealing a scar under his left eye.

"After they tortured Mana to death, they turned on that boy. He'd been to traumatized by what he'd just seen as well as all the fights that he'd fought while trying to help get the other children out. He hadn't known anything about the girls that had been found and his uncle and his uncle's lover, the one who had drawn him into arrived as the bastards were leaving. The boy hadn't tried to defend himself. He had tried to save Mana, but he'd been bound in chains. Some paperwork had been left behind. It turned out the only way Mana had been allowed to take the boy was for the boy to be made a slave."

Tim looked at Allen, tears in his eyes, while Kanda was trying to process the information as quickly as it was told.

"Now, the ringleader left a message that stuck in the boy's mind after he'd had his goons scar the boy, mentally and physically. He told the boy that what he'd just witnessed was the result of getting involved in others affairs. He'd warned the boy that if he ever got involved in the man's business again, the treatment he'd received that day would seem like heaven. Now the boy that they'd used died not long after they left. He'd been brunette with silvery grey eyes and a red arm. He'd been as innocent as Mana could keep him considering he'd been on the streets when Mana had met him a few years prior. After having found someone to love him, he wanted to help others like him. After that night, he died. In his place a white-haired boy, scarred and scared, hated by those he now served was born. The white-haired boy locked away the fighting clown that he'd once been and grew to become extremely cynical of others."

Allen stopped to breathe. Tim was crying, not sure what his new daddy was telling him. Kanda remained contemplatively quiet.

"The boy learned quickly several things about the world in general. He was smart, in fact it turned out that he'd somehow become a young genius, most likely to avoid the punishments he received from his new masters who both blamed him for the death of their beloved Mana. Not that the boy blamed them. The boy had been named after Mana's dog which had died the day they met so the boy was rarely called by name in those first few years. But when the boy was deciding on a career at his owner's demands he went into a field that would allow his owners to track and check up on missing persons from the cages. It seems psychiatry was the best way, so to help those that he might have unwillingly hurt and to make sure that all of those boys had come to no harm, he became a psychiatrist. Of course, having become the genius he had, he had taken several courses not related to the profession chosen for him by his master, but as long as he could help those boys, he didn't care. It was when he first started researching everything surrounding those cages that boy learned of the girls held captive. They'd also been forced to perform, while chained to beds. The boy knew already that that had been harsh, and he was certain that if they didn't perform to their customers satisfaction, they would be treated to visits from the sadistic men and occasional woman."

Allen had to stop. He remembered learning what he as the champion would have been doing the next night if he didn't have any requests for fighting. He needed a break. He knew Tim was most likely too young too understand, but if Tim was going to live with him, he had to be warned. If Kanda was going to pursue this route he needed to be informed.

"It seemed," Allen said eventually breaking the silence, "that there was more that the boy didn't know. The champion was, if there were no requests to watch him fight someone, a special option for those who visited the girls. One that the sadists usually chose, and that the ringleader made money off of. Now, the ringleader, since Mana had demanded that his boy not be allowed to be used like that while helping them, was caught, but they couldn't convict him on the charge of selling prostitutes or pedophilia. They could get him for child exploitation and they did try to save everyone, but one of the boys had been so drugged up to keep him apparently from killing his guards, that the rescuers believed he was dead. A later investigation found the boy to be very much alive, but basically comatose.

"Now, the white-haired boy knew that every one of the victims would eventually need counseling of some sort, and he was right. He quickly became the courts last hope for several psychiatric related cases. There are only three that haven't met this boy since being saved. Lavi the Hacker was adopted by a well-known psychiatrist and became the owner of an arcade that happens to be located near where the cages used to be, though he most likely doesn't realize it.

"The other two became husband and wife much to the girl's brother's dismay, though since he was able to read people, he managed to gain her brother's approval. Though they have security, it's nowhere near as good as mine. Even though she'd been bound to a bed and he'd have constant headaches, they actually are doing very well and have kept off the radar, though while she was living with her brother, no one could get close to her," Allen was almost done.

"Now, no one but the boy, his owners, and the ringleader and his goons know who truly saved the children stuck in those cages. Well I guess the dead know as well, but the boy wanted to keep it that way, until he was freed from his slavery at least. He wanted to help, but after everything that he'd been through at the hands of his masters, he couldn't let himself go back to the fighting clown he'd locked away. This caused him to have nightmares. He'd wake up in the middle of the night, shivering. If he looked around the room and he'd been sleeping by himself, there'd be blood on the walls and claw marks in the floor. It was as though the clown he kept hidden as deep as he could found it's way out as the boy, well man really though the white-haired boy is only fifteen, slept," Allen finally finished.

"Are you telling me," Kanda ground out through clenched teeth, "that you're the brat who fucking defeated me and then got me saddled in that bastard Tiedoll's household?"

"I didn't get to help choose who went where," Allen sighed in defeat. "I wanted to help all those kids that were being forced to fight against their will. I begged Mana to let me and then he was murdered in front of my eyes. Do you know how it feels to know you happen to be the cause of the only person to care about you's death? It's not a fun feeling. You'll try to do anything to honor their memory. Debase yourself to your uncle and his lover if need be. Get stabbed by sadists or nearly drowned. You'll let yourself be kicked over and over even as you hate your life and what you've become because other than that one person you know what everyone else think s of you is true. You _are _a monster, a freak, a murderer."

"Daddy is not a monster or freak or murderer!" Tim's voice cut through the silent suddenly still air. "Daddy is _Daddy! _He's awesome! Anyone says otherwise and I'll - I'll bite them! Even if it's Daddy! Cause Daddy's a hero!"

"Of course your Daddy's a hero, squirt," Kanda couldn't help saying as his scowl became less fearsome. He was laughing inside. His fucking Moyashi was a fucking closet hero and a fucking martyr.

"It's gonna be our job to help him save Alma, squirt. And you've got to be extra careful, too. The enemy likes to hurt little boys the most," Kanda informed the blonde.

"You guys don't need to help me."

"Try to stop me, fucking Moyashi," Kanda snarled murderously.

"I guess we'd better get BookerBunny, then."

"Yes, we need to get-you fucking bastard, you were fucking toying with us!"

"I believe Clowny did inform you that I was very well informed, Kanda."

"You fucking bastard. I _ought_ to run you through, but then Tim might come after me."

"Just let me tell Mana," Allen turned to the grave, "I'll meet you two at the car. Don't let Tim in the front seat. I'll be going through the house real quick, to pick up that paperwork."

"We'll meet you at the fucking Mini, Moyashi," Kanda said watching as the doctor pulled his gloves off.

"Well, Mana, I found him. I hope everything turns out all right. I know I kind of lied about Wisely and Linali, but I figured it was best if he thought she was happy. She can't escape her brother and Wisely's too drugged up because of his migraines to do anything. Linali doesn't mind being stuck with her brother though. He just doesn't want her getting hurt again. I'm adopting Tim, Cross's biological son. It isn't fair that this boy not be given a chance just because Neah and Cross were on the outs with each other. I think things are going to get worse before they get better. I just have a feeling and the last time I had a feeling like this was when I tried to run away with Narein. His sister was murdered and Narein blamed me so I hope Kanda, Tim, and Lavi don't end up hating me. I'm sorry I made your death seem less gruesome than it was, but I don't think I could handle telling them about how they drugged me with so much that it was after they'd tortured you that I killed you. I'm sorry, Mana. I swear if we could turn back time, I'd go back and listen to you," Allen said as soon as he was certain Kanda and Tim were gone.

It was about a half an hour later that Kanda saw his Moyashi exit the house, papers in hand and a pentacle on his face. Kanda couldn't help himself as his Moyashi climbed in the driver's seat.

"You took too long," he muttered before kissing him on the pentacle then his lips. He thought he saw a slight blush, but wasn't too sure. He was sure though that his Moyashi had kissed him back after the initial surprise.

"Get a room," Tim stopped Kanda from deepening the kiss. This time his Moyashi really did turn red, causing Kanda to chuckle.


	5. Linali

From the cemetery they went to whom Kanda called the stupid rabbit's place.

At Lavi's, Kanda didn't even bother to knock. He had the spare key.

"Oi, stupid rabbit, get whatever you're doing dressed. I got company," Kanda yelled as he opened the door.

"Damn it, Kanda, just as I was getting her comfortable, too," Lavi's voice could be heard whining.

"It's okay, Lavi," the woman's voice reached Allen's ears, causing Allen to slap himself.

"So I lied, she's not married, yet and neither is Wisely. They just happen to have unique circumstances that allow them to be safe," Allen quickly stated before the girl could come out with Lavi. "Tim, why don't you play on the machines? I'm sure that currently Lavi has them so that you won't have to pay to play."

"Okay, but if anyone calls you a murderer, freak, or monster, Kanda better bite them for me," he declared.

"I'm sure Kanda will do much worse, Tim," Allen informed him as he kissed his forehead.

"When'd you get a son, Yu?" Lavi asked bouncing in.

"Don't call me that, Rabbit," Kanda growled.

"But it's your name, Yu!" Lavi whined.

"Linali, does your brother know you're here?" Allen asked quietly of the woman with short dark hair that had followed Lavi out of his apartment's bedroom.

The woman looked him up and down and then demanded who the hell he was and why he was there.

"The Moyashi is here to help rescue Alma," Kanda didn't let him answer, causing his Moyashi to sigh.

"You, know, Yu, I really must object to that name. Just because I'm British and twenty-two does not mean I didn't learn a few foreign languages. I did become a genius you know."

"Really? Then why the hell did you just call him Yu?" Lavi demanded having noticed the doctor's scar.

"We had a deal when he started seeing me. Besides, you and Bookman probably shouldn't get involved but I'm fairly certain that you want to save the last of the caged boys. Everyone else escaped or died that very night, fifteen years ago, Lavi the Hacker, aka BookerBunny," Kanda's Moyashi giggled a little.

When Kanda thought about it, it wasn't until now that that infuriatingly fake smile had been put into place.

"Stop smiling, Moyashi," Kanda suddenly told the man.

"But then that opens up a bunch of questions, you know. I really _don't _like questions," Allen tried to appeal using puppy dog eyes on Kanda, causing Lavi to laugh.

"Those don't work on Yu, I should know-" Lavi was cut off by Kanda's disgruntled, "Fine."

"Yay, thank you! It makes Clowny happy, too, you know."

"Well, I thought you said Clowny was dead," Kanda muttered.

"His physical appearance is. His personality is locked away. As Allen, I can't really fight. As Clowny, I become a fighting clown, that's why I wanted to warn you. This is going to be dangerous. Alma's so drugged up, I'm not completely sure how cognizant he is anymore."

"But we can save him?" Kanda demanded.

"With me and Clowny of course you can. Clowny's no good with computers but with Lavi to take my place once Clowny is unlocked we'll get Alma out. But I must ask you that if we have to leave anyone behind, leave me. I can handle the torture and drugs. You guys need to stay as safe as possible."

"Why the hell did you get involved in the first place, Moyashi?"

"Because I had Mana. I wanted all those boys forced to fight to entertain others to find _their _Manas," Allen shrugged.

Lavi and Linali had both been shocked into silence when Kanda had given in to the white-haired man with him. When they finally snapped out of it, Kanda had cuffed the man lightly on his shoulder.

"Idiot, what'll happen to that boy if his Daddy gets taken captive?"

"He'll become Linali and Komui's responsibility. They can keep him as safe as anyone could once I'm gone."

"What'll become of your patients?"

"They're actually all doing very well. Most of them will do just fine without me anymore, including you. You've made loads of progress just by meditating. Then you have your martial arts sessions to give you the physical activity that you need. I'll probably escape in a few months. They'll try to send me to a psychiatrist, but seeing as I'm one of the best, I know all the tricks and employ several that others don't believe work, so I'll be fine."

"What about me?" Kanda asked softly, his lips close enough to the doctor that his breathe tickled the man he was speaking to.

"What about you? I told you you'd be fine. You're almost perfectly safe for society. I'm fairly certain once we get Alma Karma back, you'll be fine. You'll be relieved," Allen shrugged.

"And Cross and Neah?" Kanda jerked back like he was scalded by a boiling pot.

"Oh, they're done with me. Kicked me out, gave me my papers, and everything. Nobody can get into my apartment if Cross couldn't so I know it'll be intact when I escape. Trust me on this, Kanda. I _have _to."

"To atone for Mana? Or for Clowny?" Kanda demanded, lips curled in disgust. "Can't you see what you've built?"

"Can't you see that if even one child was left with those sick bastards, I failed Mana? I didn't tell you all of that so you could use it to keep from helping you save the only child we didn't get out of the damn cages!"

"I think that's the first time I've ever heard you curse, Moyashi, but you aren't getting left behind."

"After what they forced you to do, you're better off leaving him behind," his Moyashi said, "it'll give me a chance to reek havoc and if Cross or Uncle Neah appear, I can get revenge on them as well. Allen thinks everything through. It's me who don't and it's me who'll be left behind if need be. Trust me when I tell you even with me being out of practice and out of shape, I'll still beat you in the cages. Allen doesn't realize you _actually _like him nor that Tim does. He doesn't know what it's like to truly be cared for. He is only about fifteen, well, the name is more like seventeen years old, but the Allen personality is only fifteen. I'm only about twenty-two years old, though I can't be certain. We made up a birthday for me, by making it my adoption date. That's when Mana gave the name Allen to me. But when he was murdered, let's just say I couldn't handle being Allen for a while. When I finally could, that goody-two-shoes was handling everything just fine."

"What do you mean? I'm sorry but who are you?"

"I'm the one that when Allen thinks he's about to lose, he calls upon because I _don't _lose, _ever_," The sinister voice answered Lavi's question.

"Oh fine, Clowny," Kanda grumbled. "I guess if he's going to this extreme to prove a point I'll leave the idiot behind, if necessary."

"What the hell just happened?" Lavi asked only to be greeted by a white-haired imp smiling at him.

"And who is he?" Linali demanded hiding a little behind Lavi.

"He's my shrink," Kanda finally answered. "And he's here because he knows the most about how to get Alma out."

"I can also get you unlocked, Lavi. I'm guessing since Crowned_Clown didn't IM you, you called for help from Linali, since you found her location about...three months ago."

"How did you know?" Lavi was dumbfounded.

"Why do you have their mark?"

"Because I destroyed their plans fifteen years ago. Did you know it only takes a man about thirteen minutes to lose all reasoning if he truly has nothing to protect? It only takes a nine-year-old boy three when he loses the only family he's ever known."

"At his own hand?" Lavi asked, knowing suddenly the one thing that Allen had yet to tell them.

"No time at all. He loses all reasoning and becomes prime bait. It really doesn't matter all that much what you think of me. I begged to be allowed to help, and then I failed. All I'm trying to do is finish what Mana died for. Alma will be unconscious until after I've escaped, so I'll be able to help him if he needs it. Tim will be fine for a few months without me and like I said my patients will all be fine for a few months, besides I already scheduled vacation. You guys just make sure he goes to school, please. Even if his father is a sadistic bastard with womanizing and pedophilic ways, it doesn't mean that Timcanpy's the same."

"He does have a temper when anyone, even _you_, says something derogatory about you."

"It'll go away when he understands everything he was informed of."

"No it won't, Moyashi. You're one of those fucking martyrs we keep being told about. Hell, you were _our _fucking martyr and yet here you go again, asking to be allowed to get yourself possibly killed just to save the only one who couldn't get freed because the rescuers were idiots. Wisely was drugged up too you know."

"I know, I've checked everyone's med charts. Yours happens to be the cleanest. They didn't feel to much of a need to alter or sedate you since you were willing to obey with little question. What was your punishment to be?"

Kanda glared at his Moyashi.

"I was told I wouldn't get fed my first night there if I lost. Since I had only recently gotten used to eating regularly, I decided losing would be a bad thing. But against you I could see a fear of losing and not because of something as insignificant as food."

"I _did _notice that you ate a lot of ice cream," Kanda side-stepped the question, or at least he tried to.

"Doesn't answer the question. _If _you don't answer I'll come up with some way to get even with you for not telling me."

"They wanted to use the others as experiments. As long as I won they were _supposed _to leave all of them alone."

"We were boys. How could we know back then that adults could and would break their word to children and slaves?"

"You're free, though," Kanda seemed confused.

"Of Neah, but Cross still has some debts he wants paid. Until he has no debt he's not signing. It's not surprising. I told him they _both _needed to sign it. He refused. He gets to deal with the consequences. I don't feel sorry for the bastard."

"Damn, Moyashi, have I been rubbing off on you?"

"It's the whole saving Alma thing. Once we've done so, I'll be good, again. I can promise that. Though Clowny has to be allowed freedom every now and again. I try to make sure it's as far away from people as possible or I lock myself up in a room," the doctor shrugged as he went to the computer, unaware of Kanda's longing gaze that was quickly schooled into a scowl.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: First I'd like to apologize for the long wait. My computer crashed. Luckily I had back-ups of the chapters I was trying to get to a point that I was happy with them. The problem after that, however, was that I don't trust working on other computers. Now just last week I got my new computer, but I've been taking the last week getting used to Windows 8. It isn't that hard, but I've really not been doing a lot on a computer, using my Kindle to keep reading fanfics.<strong>

** I was looking back through the reviews and realised that a few things that needed to clarified. **

**First off, I actually dreamed bits and pieces of this before I actually typed it. My subconscious could be called sick. Now the story is ultimately about how Allen and Kanda end up together. Sorry if you don't like slash. It starts the way it does because the journey is what the story is about.**

**Allen and Kanda have a strictly professional relationship at the start of the story. Kanda does not recognize his shrink as the boy he lost a fight to on the night they were rescued from the cages when he was a kid. Allen feels he owes Kanda for making it impossible to have a rematch with the boy but also because he had learned that when everyone was rescued, one person was left behind. That person had been Kanda's best friend. **

**The kiss that occurred at the end of the last chapter was purely accidental. Kanda literally could not stop from kissing the younger man. **

**Don't be afraid to ask questions. I promise to try to answer as quickly as possible but I should warn you that this story over half the time confuses me because I have no clue what's going to happen. I literally dreamed parts of it and went to put what I dreamed on paper only to have it morph into a story that I felt had to be shared so I could share with those who have as dark or darker subconsciousnesses than I. **


	6. Escape and Capture

Months later they had finally found the room he was locked in. How had he survived? That's when Kanda saw the tubes connected to the woman who had been his best friend. Somehow the ringleader had been convinced Alma was male, but even his psychiatrist knew the truth about Alma. Now came the hard part, getting her out.

Allen had made several plans, but every single one seemed to end up with someone left behind. He had purposely left his make-up off when they invaded. If anyone was to be left behind, he felt it should be him. Allen, or rather Clowny, made sure to stand guard as they removed all the tubes from the unconscious nearly dead male on the table.

"You shouldn't have come back," Clowny heard the voice, but knew it wasn't Alma's.

"Why not?" he asked not daring to look inside the room afraid of the worst. If it had hit rock bottom, Allen was going to kill him then revive him just so he could kill him again.

"Because now I have five rats instead of one," he recognized that voice. It was the ringleader.

"Really? Let's see, I think we just figured to exchange rats," Clowny smiled evilly. "You can actually do long haul experimentation on me, and they take that rat somewhere where it can either die out peacefully or revive itself to be brought back to you. Either way you get the rat you failed to keep fifteen years ago."

"You brat!" the ringleader lunged for him.

He sidestepped out of the fat man's way. Beside him was a stocky man with a single strip for a mustache.

"No, see, _now _I'm a psychiatrist. I'm no longer a brat. An idiot, freak, murderer, monster, oddball, cursed one, and _just about _anything else, but I'm no longer the same brat. See what you did to my deformed arm with _all _those drugs _you _used on it?" he held his left arm up. It was covered in an armor-like substance. "It only becomes like this when my life is threatened, you know. Otherwise, it's that same ugly red as when I was _that _brat. Let them go and I'll allow you to treat me however you feel I should be treated, but I won't meekly go at your word. I'm not naïve nor am I senile. I walk with them to the exit. Once they're out of sight, we come back in, and I obey your every word."

"Let's go," both men decided after several minutes of deliberation. They could tell they would lose if they tried to renegotiate. The man seemed to have a dark aura surrounding him.

As soon as they were out of sight, Allen was knocked out and dragged into a windowless room even further in the cages than Alma had been. When he came to, he found he was chained to a bed, most likely one of the ones that had been used to house the girls that they had originally been unaware of. He smiled at the man looking at him.

"Cheeky bastard," the man growled as he went to alert his bosses, who were still deciding what to do with the man, that their prize had woken up.

When the two men entered the room, they flicked on a light revealing that this was a joint torture and sex room for the girls.

"What _should _we do with you first? See, we need answers to questions that I'm _fairly _certain only you could answer," the fat one spoke first.

"No doubt, but unless you give me names to call you, I'm gonna call you guys Wannabe and Fatso. Don't take offense, that's just all I can come up with when I haven't eaten in, I'm guessing it's only been twelve hours based on my Food-O-Meter."

He couldn't say anything after that due to the stockier man punching him in the gut.

"I am Adam," the fatter one spoke, "and my partner is Malcolm. You promised to obey every word."

"Did I? I don't remember that. Did you get a recording of it? Wait, I have yet to hear an order."

"What the hell are you?" Malcolm demanded.

"Do you really want to waste time that could be used experimenting on me to ask a question with such an obvious answer?" he rolled his eyes.

"Do you want to get punched again?"

"Not really, but I have a feeling that things aren't going to stay like this forever."

"Of course not. Our experiments cover a nice wide range, so you'll be feeling a variety of effects and we need you to be honest about it," Adam smiled. "The first drugs we want to test are being considered pain medications, though I didn't realize about your arm. That could be a bit of a problem."

"It won't be unless you take things too far," Allen shrugged. "I have a feeling by the time you're done experimenting, It'll have changed as well. After all, you want me to gain control over it or die, correct?"

The men stared at him. Adam grinned widely, while Malcolm scowled.


End file.
